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How Can I Adjust to Life After the Honeymoon?
- Daniel Flores
- 25 minutes ago
- 5 min read
Life's biggest changes can bring both happiness and hardship, and Florecer Family Counseling is here to help you through any challenges. Serving clients in Woodland Hills and San Bernardino, CA, we're ready to support you whether you're about to get married, just married, or facing relationship problems. Don't wait to get the help you deserve – give us a call or contact us today.
Many couples find themselves struggling with the transition into marriage, dealing with issues such as identity struggles and stresses coming from the various pressures in life. In this blog, we will discuss different ways that couples will struggle with adjusting to married life after the honeymoon, as well as offer guidance on how couples can adjust to their new life.
The Reality of Marriage: Beyond the Wedding Day
Getting married is one of life's most exciting moments, filled with celebration, hope, and dreams of a shared future. But what happens when the honeymoon ends and real life begins? Many couples discover that the transition from single to married life brings unexpected challenges that no one warned them about. The truth is, learning to blend two separate lives into one shared journey requires more adjustment than most people anticipate.
Understanding Marriage and Its Challenges
Marriage is a great commitment that not everyone is necessarily ready for. This is evident with the nearly 50% divorce rate in the nation. But why is this the case?
Autonomy Changes: Once you are married, life is no longer about you alone, and many decisions are not for you to make on your own anymore. In marriage, decisions should be made together as a team.
Identity Conflict: After going from single to married after being alone for so long, many people may find themselves struggling with their new identity and lifestyle.
Media Expectations: Social media and pop culture portray love under a rosy tint. What they don't show most of the time are the struggles that couples need to face and the difficulty of the choices that couples encounter in marriage.
Reality and Challenges: Many partners worry their relationship is failing when they encounter normal challenges, not realizing that genuine effort and occasional conflict are part of healthy marriages.
Financial Difficulty: The leading cause of divorce in the United States is disagreement about money. If spending habits and budgeting beliefs are not aligned, finances tend to fall apart, and the marriage follows suit.
Boundaries and Communication: With both partners' lives now being interwoven, new boundaries are to be considered. But in order to respect said boundaries, communication must take place, otherwise resentment will build up in one partner towards the other over a problem one party did not even know existed.
Adjusting to the Challenges of Marriage
Adjusting to the new married life can be challenging, but you don't need to go through things alone anymore. As long as you work with your partner as a team, you should be able to set a strong foundation for your marriage. Below are a few tips for adjusting to the married life:
Develop Strong Communication
Listen to what your spouse is saying and practice patience while trying to understand them
Avoid accusing your spouse when they do something you don't like
Discuss the health of your relationship openly and with respect.
Build Shared Routines
Try to spend mornings and nights together
Take walks together in nature
Have regular date nights several times a month
Establish Clear Expectations and Boundaries
Discuss shared household or family responsibilities and expectations
Make a budget to manage your money together responsibly
Set expectations for time spent away from your spouse
Maintain Personal Activities/Hobbies
Maintain your personal hobbies
Hang out with friends and talk to them frequently
Work hard towards personal goals you have
Consider professional help
At times, the change or commitment can be too much for some people to adjust to. Only when their new life unfolds around them can they understand the weight of their commitment, and that can be scary. When you find yourself in a situation similar to this, it may be wise to start considering individual counseling or couples counseling, such as the services offered by Florecer Family Counseling
Build a Strong Foundation
At the end of the day, a strong foundation at the beginning of the relationship is invaluable for keeping your marriage strong for the long run. If you do not discuss your boundaries or expectations early, then it sets you both up for failure and disappointment in the future. Love is more than that rosy feeling you get when you see someone; love is an action and a commitment to someone in the best and worst times. Don't hesitate to seek counseling to figure out how to best love someone, as well as how to best establish boundaries and expectations with someone. Schedule an appointment with Florecer Family Counseling today.
Related Blogs
How Can I Have A Thriving Christian Marriage? In the previous blog, we discuss how a marriage can strengthen their marriage while honoring God. Having your marriage built on a strong foundation is one of the most important things you can do for your relationship. Read more in the blog: How Can I Have A Thriving Christian Marriage?
Navigating the Unique Challenges That Face Modern Married Couples: You might also find helpful insights in our upcoming content about the complexities couples encounter in today's world. In our upcoming blog, we will take a look at the different challenges that modern couples are faced with and provide helpful insights on how to work through these challenges.
FAQ
How can I balance my personal life with marriage? Talk openly about your needs and create a schedule that works for both of you. After you reach an understanding about this, find time for yourself as well as time together.
How do we fairly divide household responsibilities? Consider all of the household responsibilities that need to get done, and also consider how much your partner works outside of the household. Discuss how you can balance responsibilities and work together as a team and come to an agreement.
How can we keep the marriage exciting after several years? Make sure you put in the effort to explore life with your partner and experience new things together. Make time to continue going on dates regularly and take time to show that you really care.
How can we overcome communication issues in the marriage? Listen to each other patiently and avoid blaming your spouse. When an issue arises, do not start the conversation with anger or frustration, but with a willingness to overcome it as a team.
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